Writing A Strong Opening To Your Business Letter

비즈니스 작문 2

Lesson 60

Writing A Strong Opening To Your Business Letter

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Lesson 120

WRITING A STRONG OPENING TO YOUR BUSINESS LETTER

Grammar Pattern

Business 25 min Speaking 75%

Warm-up

Discuss these questions with your teacher before reading.

  1. How often do you write formal business letters or emails at work? What is the most common type?
    직장에서 공식 비즈니스 서신이나 이메일을 얼마나 자주 작성하시나요? 가장 일반적인 유형은 무엇인가요?
  2. When you receive a business email, what makes you want to keep reading versus delete it?
    비즈니스 이메일을 받았을 때, 계속 읽고 싶게 만드는 것과 삭제하게 만드는 것은 무엇인가요?

Vocabulary

Key words and expressions from the reading.

correspondence /ˌkɒrɪˈspɒndəns/
written communication, especially formal letters or emails  |  서신, 통신문
"I refer to previous correspondence in respect of the above."
outstanding /aʊtˈstændɪŋ/
remaining unpaid or unresolved (in a financial context)  |  미지급의, 미해결의
"We have not received your cheque for the outstanding arrears."
arrears /əˈrɪərz/
money owed that should have been paid earlier  |  체납금, 연체금
"Your cheque for the outstanding arrears."
weigh down /weɪ daʊn/
to burden or make something heavy and difficult  |  무겁게 하다, 부담을 주다
"Don't weigh down the front of your letter with boring repetition."
headline /ˈhedlaɪn/
the main title or most important statement that captures attention  |  헤드라인, 표제
"Your opening paragraph is both the headline and the lead."
relevant /ˈreləvənt/
closely connected to the topic at hand; appropriate and useful  |  관련 있는, 적절한
"Give the most relevant information in your first sentence."
5 min

Reading

Read the passage with your teacher.
선생님과 함께 지문을 읽어보세요.

Grammar Pattern
Writing a strong opening to your business letter
Your first job in writing any letter is to gain your reader’s attention. It’s an important principle of effective writing to put the most important information first. Your opening paragraph is both the headline and the lead for the message that follows in the rest of the letter.
Don’t weigh down the front of your letter with boring repetition of information that your reader already knows. Many letters fail to start well because they follow the standard paragraph of every business letter. Here are some typical examples of openings in business letters
Thank you for your letter of 8th March 1998, which has been passed to me for my attention.
I refer to previous correspondence in respect of the above and note that to date we have not received your cheque for the outstanding arrears.
I write with reference to our telephone conversation yesterday regarding the above matter.
Starting with a reference to the incoming letter is weak and wastes your reader's time. Most readers skip it, looking to the second and third paragraphs to get the answer to their questions. If you step right into your subject in the first paragraph, you’ll show your reader you do not intend to waste valuable time. So get rid of any opening reference to the reader's letter and answer the most important question or give the most relevant information in your first sentence.
Make your first paragraph do something other than just referring to known information—so plunge straight into your message and don’t waste your reader’s time. For example, you could
answer a question
ask a question
explain an action taken
express pleasure or regret
give information
As the opening paragraph sets the tone for your letter, try to avoid using tired phrases that are wordy, give little information and create a formal and impersonal tone. Using the classic business-speak opening of Further to... almost guarantees the rest of the letter will be a typical, long-winded, standard piece of business writing.
These opening phrases are so popular because we don’t have to think of what to write. Watch out for standard phrases in opening paragraphs. Examples are:
Further to my recent
I am writing
I refer to my letter dated
I refer to previous correspondence
I write in reference to
In respect of the above
Recent correspondence
Regarding
With reference to
With regards to
So be sure your opening paragraph sets the right tone for your letter. Be direct and use your words positively so your reader has a good impression from the beginning of your letter. Decide what is the most important information—and put it in the your first paragraph. Don’t be afraid to start your letter strongly.

Korean Trap

Korean speakers often make this mistake in business letter writing.

❌ "I am writing this letter for informing you about our new service."
✅ "I am writing to inform you about our new service."

비즈니스 레터의 목적을 밝힐 때 'for informing'이 아니라 'to inform' (to + 동사원형)을 사용합니다. 'I am writing to + 동사원형'은 비즈니스 서신의 가장 기본적인 패턴입니다. for 뒤에 동명사를 쓰면 목적이 아닌 이유를 나타내는 뉘앙스가 됩니다.

Discussion

Discuss these questions with your teacher after reading.

  1. The passage says "Don't weigh down the front of your letter with boring repetition." But in Korean business writing, referencing previous correspondence is considered polite. How do you balance Korean formality expectations with the advice to get straight to the point?
    본문에서 '지루한 반복으로 서신 앞부분을 무겁게 하지 마라'고 합니다. 그러나 한국 비즈니스 작문에서는 이전 서신을 참조하는 것이 예의입니다. 한국식 격식과 요점 직행 조언 사이의 균형을 어떻게 맞추시나요?
  2. The text shows weak openings like "Thank you for your letter of 8th March." What is your typical opening line when writing business emails in English? Can you improve it using the passage's advice?
    '3월 8일자 귀하의 서신에 감사드립니다'와 같은 약한 시작을 보여줍니다. 영어 비즈니스 이메일의 일반적인 시작 문구는 무엇인가요? 본문의 조언으로 개선할 수 있나요?
  3. The passage emphasizes "put the most important information first." How does this principle apply to emails versus formal printed letters?
    '가장 중요한 정보를 먼저 넣으라'고 강조합니다. 이 원칙이 이메일과 공식 인쇄 서신에 각각 어떻게 적용되나요?
  4. Think about a recent business email you wrote. How would you rewrite the opening paragraph using the advice from this lesson?
    최근에 작성한 비즈니스 이메일을 생각해 보세요. 이 수업의 조언을 사용하여 도입 단락을 어떻게 다시 쓰시겠습니까?

Lesson Summary / 수업 요약

Today's Topic: WRITING A STRONG OPENING TO YOUR BUSINESS LETTER

Level: Business (BIZ)

Review this lesson before your next class! / 다음 수업 전에 복습하세요!